Bread and Bonjour

I've been pondering two things that, to me, seem quintessentially French - and that you really need to understand, absorb, and participate in to become comfortable living in France or with the French. As my title suggests, these things are bread and greetings such as "bonjour". Let me break it down for you:

Bread: The staff (or stuff) of life, right? In France, you simply MUST eat bread. There is no conversation about it, like, "Hey. Should we go buy some bread for [insert meal here]?" You go to the bakery every single day and you purchase whatever bread supplies you need to lay in for that day. End of story. People here eat bread with any and every meal they consume. Bread with their coffee or hot chocolate in the morning. Bread for their sandwiches at lunch. Bread (of course) with dinner and most especially with cheese, which you eat at dessert time. And I'm not talking Wonder Bread here. Mention sliced sandwich bread like that, and most French-born citizens will give you an incredulous look, as if you just announced you like to eat dog poo for dinner. No, French bread is the long, crusty on the outside, chewy on the inside baguette, first and foremost. There are many other kinds - I am most partial to the bigger cousin of the baguette, the flute, because it is a little less dense than the baguette and has a fluffier interior. (My husband rolls his eyes at me when I state this preference.) There are breakfast breads (pain au lait, pain au mie, brioche) that don't have a hard crust and are excellent for dipping in beverages, there are sweet pastries (pain au raisin and pain au chocolat) that are related to the illustrious, flaky and delicious croissant, and there are literally thousands of regional specialties in both sweet and non-sweet, hard and soft varieties. For example, in my village they make a big ring of country bread called a couronne, and this is apparently impossible to get in Paris. It's very good, but I am a little stumped as to why you just don't eat something else while you're in Paris that they don't make here? (Like Chinese take-out or kebabs from the 24-hour kebab stand.)

But this is the thing about bread: it is not just a staple in your diet. It is part and parcel of the French man or woman's identity. Bread is not just sustenance; it is religion. I am pretty sure that there have been wars here (or at least really big arguments) over where you could get the tastiest bread. Everyone has their particular preferences, not just for the type of breads they prefer to eat on a given day, but also for the actual bakery where these are procured. People don't just buy bread from anywhere, all willy-nilly. No. Absolutely not. You go to the bakery you have ALWAYS gone to, and there is no deviation. I think when you move someplace new, you get a window of time to sample the local bakeries, but once you've gone there multiple times in a week, you're committed. And if your bakery runs out of something you want? You go without. No running across town and picking up a loaf from the other bakery, oh no. Perhaps, if you wear a wig, dark glasses, and a cape, you could drive to the next village over and buy bread there, maybe. If you had house guests, for instance, and needed bread to feed them. But you are loyal to your baker, and he or she will be loyal to you. Our bakery is literally about fifteen steps from our front door, and Patrick is now such a good and regular customer he can even take home bread if he forgets his money - he just brings payment to them later on, or even on the next day. Can you believe it??? I am working hard on ingratiating myself with the people who work there, as well, and it will be a happy day when I can say more to them than "hello", "good bye", and "one flute, please".

Bonjour: Literally, it means "good day". French people use it as an all purpose "Hello," or "Hey there!" What's different about this greeting is that you use it, um, all the time, and with everyone, whether you know them or not. First, you must greet (and say good-bye to, by the way) whoever is at the cash register in any shop or store you enter. Ditto for bars, pharmacies, the library, the post office, hotels, government offices ... anywhere, really. Even if you're just entering that building to browse around and have no intention whatsoever of buying anything or asking for any further assistance, you MUST greet them with "bonjour". (Or "bon soir", if it is after 6pm or so.) When you exit said establishment, it must be accompanied by a "au revoir", or "merci, au revoir", if they have assisted you in any way. This is gospel. It is the only civilized way to behave here, and if you don't, those employees of wherever you have just exited will gossip about you and comment on your rudeness. I am not kidding - I've now done it myself, at the campground. Wow.

And greeting people is not limited to interior spaces. We have a really deep windowsill on our ground floor window, which I sit on quite a bit, enjoying a book and/or a cigarette. Since we live in the village center, people are walking by all the time. Whether they are people I happen to know or tourists gawking at the architecture, they all will toss out a "bonjour" or "bonsoir" as they drift past me - even kids! In fact, it is now easy to tell the tourists who are from countries other than France, because they are the people who don't greet me as they walk in front of my house. (Well, there are also several long-time residents of La Canourgue who studiously ignore me and refuse to let out a bonjour in my direction. I generally pretend to be completely absorbed in my book when I see one of them coming, so I don't have to meet their eyes and recognize the slight. Or, if I'm feeling froggy, I say bonjour first, and watch the sound speed up their steps. I am hoping that, eventually - like in five years, maybe - they will get accustomed to the sight of me and grace me with a greeting.) If you're taking a walk, you say "bonjour" to anyone who makes eye contact with you, in general. Can you imagine it? Try - imagine you are walking down a street in your own town or city. Now imagine saying hello to complete strangers as you go. Strange, right? It seemed that way to me until I started doing it, and now I just can't stop. It's an addiction. But it's also 100% really and truly French. Of course, in Paris, people don't greet every person they see - the city's too enormous for that. But in the suburbs of Paris? Yep, bonjours abound. The really fun part? If you actually know the people, more often than not you also get to do the cheek-kissing thing. And that's a whole 'nother ball of wax ... I'll save cheek kissing for next time, sportsfans.

Take care of yourselves and each other, and make sure to give a nice greeting to the person behind the counter the next time you go to a bakery. Or your mechanic's. Or Target. If people look at you funny, just tell them you are experimenting with other cultural norms. If they still are giving you the hairy eyeball, just say, "merci, au revoir" and walk away. You can't win 'em all.

Pronunciation and definition guide:
baguette: bah-GETT (crusty loaf of bread, about a foot long)
flute: FLOO-tuh (crusty loaf of bread, about twice the size of the baguette)
pain au lait: pahn-oh-LAY (soft breakfast bread, made with milk)
pain au mie: pahn-oh-MEE (soft breakfast bread, as above, sweeter. Both are similar to Hawaiian rolls.)
brioche: BREE-ohsh (soft rolls with an egg wash on top to make them shiny. Sometimes have giant sugar crystals decorating them.)
pain au raisin: pahn-oh-ray-SAHN (croissant-like pastry with raisins baked in)
pain au chocolat: pahn-oh-shock-oh-LAH (croissant-like pastry with a seam or two of dark chocolate baked inside)
couronne: koo-RUN (a hearty whole-grain country bread, baked in a ring like a crown)
croissant: KWAH-sahn (you know what these are)
bonjour: BOHN-jewr (hello! or good day!)
bon soir: BOHN-swahr (good evening)
merci: MEHR-see (thank you)
au revoir: oh-vwa (good bye)